on Wed, 12/17/2014 - 13:38 by Anonymous (not verified)
I am a CTI trained coach and was taught very hard core, it’s all about the questions. And I often say it took about three years of actual coaching before I started incorporating, more consciously, my own thoughts and perspectives and on balance I believe that has been a good thing. Although I believe me offering my clients something is a good thing, I also think that those years of rigorously asking questions really embedded that invaluable skill. And I constantly question whether or not I should have just offered a question when I may have offered one of my own thoughts. I know the hat thing and I have always thought it effective but corny. At the beginning of coaching as part of the contracting process I explain that anything I offer in coaching is not right or wrong just an opportunity to offer one other perspective, that the client might consider and if they chose to align themselves with one of my suggestions, it is now theirs. I think they get that. I am not sure the definitions of coaching offered much clarity around the central question. Not whether or not advice giving has value, it would seem impossible to argue against that. But for me the question is, does that advice giving provide more value than a powerful question that provides a real insight to the coachee about an underlying assumption they have always held. In my own experience, advice giving is a very seductive and a very slippery slope. It is lovely to hear a client’s appreciation at the offer of something – affirmation from a bright, senior executive is pretty heady stuff – at least for me. So I just try to be aware of not doing advice giving too much and try not to let it make me lazy and avoid the more challenging work of the short, open, curious question approach. Good article.
Advice giving vs. powerful questioning
I am a CTI trained coach and was taught very hard core, it’s all about the questions. And I often say it took about three years of actual coaching before I started incorporating, more consciously, my own thoughts and perspectives and on balance I believe that has been a good thing. Although I believe me offering my clients something is a good thing, I also think that those years of rigorously asking questions really embedded that invaluable skill. And I constantly question whether or not I should have just offered a question when I may have offered one of my own thoughts. I know the hat thing and I have always thought it effective but corny. At the beginning of coaching as part of the contracting process I explain that anything I offer in coaching is not right or wrong just an opportunity to offer one other perspective, that the client might consider and if they chose to align themselves with one of my suggestions, it is now theirs. I think they get that. I am not sure the definitions of coaching offered much clarity around the central question. Not whether or not advice giving has value, it would seem impossible to argue against that. But for me the question is, does that advice giving provide more value than a powerful question that provides a real insight to the coachee about an underlying assumption they have always held. In my own experience, advice giving is a very seductive and a very slippery slope. It is lovely to hear a client’s appreciation at the offer of something – affirmation from a bright, senior executive is pretty heady stuff – at least for me. So I just try to be aware of not doing advice giving too much and try not to let it make me lazy and avoid the more challenging work of the short, open, curious question approach. Good article.